Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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