Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Randomize
