He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
