Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
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