He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
pray to the hookup gods
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
