"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Randomize
