Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
