You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
