Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
you traded sex for a burrito?
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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