Where did you get a picture of my penis
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Dick very happy bro
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
