woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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