just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
