Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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