Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
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