it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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