note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
