a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
