So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize