My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Randomize
