I wish I could teleport
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
