Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
