I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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