So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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