I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
it glows. i had to have it.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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