I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
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