Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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