Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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