Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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