it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
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