Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Randomize
