it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
My vagina just clenched in fear
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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