yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Randomize
