So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
