it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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