I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
Randomize
