I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
