I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Randomize
