at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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