your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Who wears a wallet chain?!
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
