Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
