my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
