Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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