i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
