Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
