u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
