one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Randomize
