i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Randomize