wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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