im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize