whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Randomize
